Our caterpillar experience

It has been a months we observed caterpillars outside Ee Rynn's school. It fascinate us. They eat non-stop. It fun to observed the girls reaction. My eldest daughter touch the caterpillar. She has seen caterpillar crawl on her teacher's fingers. Ee Wern will say: caterpillar eating. This is my first experience, learning caterpillar's life cycle.

I gathered my courage to adopt a caterpillar. I kept the caterpillar in a box with lots of holes (for air) with leaves I gathered from another plant. We were fascinated with their wonderful digestion system. They eat a lot. As a result, they poop a lot too. The last 2 legs will open as they pass motion. The poops were in green, similar to the colour of the leaves. The first night was a disaster. The caterpillar refuse to eat leaves in the box. He was trying to escape! It was the same night that I wasn't feeling well. Stomach flu. It was heavy rain too. With a heavy heart, we have to send the caterpillar back to its home so he don't starve to death. We did! Standing under the rain, we gently transfer the caterpillar. From this experience, I learnt that caterpillar eat leaves from the same tree or fresh leaves from citrus plan or curry leaves.

The next morning, one of Ee Rynn's schoolmate's mom adopt 2 caterpillars from the same tree. I told her my experience. She was hoping it will turn out well. A day after her adoption, both caterpillars turn to cocoon. She was kind to donate one for us. It's hibernation period. No activities and the cocoon is not moving. Ee Wern said the cocoon is sleeping every day. She would point at it and said : cocoon! cocoon sleeping! So cute.

The cocoon was broken this morning. Today is Wednesday, 20th November 2013. It's the cocoon's 13th day. I was so sad and thought the cocoon didn't make it. But when I was trying to look through the box, I saw an insect! The colour on the body was so dull and I was confuse. With first look, I thought it was dried leaves. With second, I saw a moth! We shout for joy! But it was not moving at all. Is he dead? All of the sudden, the moth moves its head. Then, we knew it's alive. 

We brought the moth to the park. I opened the box. The moth flap its wings. We thought it will fly away. But it remain in the box. Ee Wern was observing and said moth! moth! no more cocoon! As it was windy afternoon, we placed it under a big tree. A few hours later, we went back and the moth is still in the box. We learnt that moth will fly at night instead. After saying 'bye bye', the girls continue playing at the playground.

When the moth breaks away from the cocoon, it has to flap it's wings to gain strength. This process is similar to a crying new born. The first cry will open the baby's lung and starts breathing. The lung will continue to gain it's strength daily, similar to a moth's wing. When the moth breaks away from the cocoon, it was wet and sticky. When we gave birth to a baby, it's wet, sticky and bloody. God has beautifully made all the creatures on earth.

It was a fun journey for us and we hope to adopt another caterpillar with hope it will turn to be a beautiful butterfly.

Another Priceless Conversation

As usual, we chat a lot over our meal. Unassumingly, we are in this conversation tonight.

EeRynn : Mommy, when I grow up, I will have my own family. Will Ee Wern stays with me when I have my own family? 

Mommy : When Ee Wern grows up, she will have her own family too. Both of you will stay in touch and travel together every year. Daddy and mommy will come along. Ee Rynn and Ee Wern will take care of daddy and mommy too. 

EeRynn : Mommy, when I have children, are they your children too? 

Mommy : Your children will be my grandchildren.

EeRynn : Like we are grandchildren to po po and gong gong?

Mommy : Yes!

EeRynn : When Ee Wern has children, her children will be your grandchildren too?

Mommy : Yes.

EeRynn : How about daddy?

Mommy : Same, your children and Ee Wern's children will be daddy's grandchildren.

EeRynn : Are we going to stay in the same house?

Mommy : May be or may be not. 

EeRynn : I want to have a 4 bedrooms house.

Mommy: Oh, what is the 4 bedrooms for?

EeRynn : One for me and my husband, one for my children, one as my office if I am working and one for you and daddy.

Mommy : 'very touch' wow! Such a thoughtful plan.

EeRynn : I want you to stay near to me because I don't want to miss you.

Mommy : - smile from ear to ear - 

To be able to have the time to communicate without rushing through a conversation, allowing her to lead the conversation and see the way she express her thought is priceless. This is why I stayed home for.

- Conversation on Monday, 18 November 2013 ~ @ 6 years old ~

'Ban Mian' or 'Pan Mee'

Pan Mee is my childhood favourite. I love soupy noodle and this is one of them. My daughters like it too. As we are on the journey to know good food in different continents, we have chosen the one that is close to our heart, the place I grew up - Seri Kembangan.

According to The Star newspaper on 18 April 2008, the village was established in 1952 when the British moved Chinese villagers living around Sungai Besi to a centralized location due to the communist threat during the insurgency. During its early days, the village had 50 houses and all were built from scratch because the British only provided empty plots of land. Most of the 15,000 inhabitants earned meagre incomes as mining workers and rubber tappers. Yes, that's the humble beginning of my ancestor. ^^

People speaks Hakka. It is known as Hakka village too. Pan Mee is a Hakka-style noodle. It's literally translates to 'flat flour noodle'. The dough is made from flour. We add eggs to enhance the flavor of the noodle. This recipe is from my mom.

Ingredients (3 persons):

1. 2-3 cups (estimates) flour : Organic unbleached flour (all purpose flour is fine too)

2. 2 medium size eggs

3. 1 cups of anchovies

4. 6-8 cloves of shallots

5. Vegetable - sweet potatoes leaves (you may put any vegetable you like)

6. Shredded chicken/pork

7. Cili padi

8. Salt

9. Parsley to garnish

Steps:

1. Beat 2 medium size eggs (avoid bubbles)

2. Mix the flour into the beaten egg slowly. Hand-knead until it become dough. If it's too dry, add some water. If it's watery, add some flour.

3. Leave the dough for 5-10 minutes. 

4. Torn the dough into smaller piece and roll it with rolling pin to flatten it.

5. Peel it to different shapes and sizes as you wish. Most common shapes is flat stripes of noodle.

6. Add some cooking oil to wok to fried the anchovies and shallots. Fried until it's fragrant. Add water into the wok and let it boil for 30 minutes to an hour until fragrant.

7. Add shredded chicken and bring to boil.

8. Add vegetables and bring to boil.

9. The flatten noodle (we tear it slowly to put into the soup) is added slowly. Bring the whole pot to boil.

10. Add some salt.

11. Garnish it with parsley and served.

12. Minced cili padi with soya sauce may be served together.

Notes:

Be patient when mix the beaten eggs and flour. It might not set as a dough for the first time. We use organic unbleached flour because the noodle will turn out soft and smooth. 

                                           

A merry heart model children's future behavior in managing the unexpected

I was reading an article of the value of laughter at home.  As I was reflecting on some pointers in the article, I realized I 'sometimes' over react in small little things like little hands accidentally drop my IPad, spill juices on table, whining of not liking the food I prepared, complains over their daily routine, throwing tantrum to get more attention and so on. Well, it does make me feeling guilty. It makes me feel worst when the article said, our children behavior models after our behaviors in managing the unexpected. 

I am writing this to remind myself to lighten up the unexpected situation at home. Being discern and aware is the starting. I have to remind myself that my reaction to the unexpected teaches my children many things. If I am showing a happy heart with discern brain, it will help my children to model me in managing their frustrating dilemma in the future. I want to fill their memories bank account with positiveness. I will add laughter into my daily responsibility and routine by:

1. Counting 1 to 5 so my brain will stop for a moment before I react

2. Put a smile on my face so I can think better

3. Instead of asking 'why' or blame, lecture and scold my children, I will bite my tongue and continue to smile... so I can calm down

4. Pray to God so He can guide me in handling the unexpected situation

5. Discern between a true crisis and and opportunity for a healthy laughter... This will takes a lot of practice...

Please share if you have something that work very well for you :-)

Outdoor Excursion

I had decided to think out of the box. Learning don't confine on workbook alone. Learning is all around us. Previously, I can concentrate and have one to one time with my eldest daughter while my baby took her afternoon nap. As my second daughter grow, she skip her afternoon nap and need a lot of attention from me.

I have decided to bring the girls for an outdoor excursion. It's not typical me of going outdoor without planning what to do. I go ahead with no end in mind and let the girls lead me. We started having lunch under a hut. It was a windy day. I brought along their chalk and crayon with a roll of paper. The girls started with drawing. It was really fun to see them sharing and communicating. One using body language and the other talking. The younger one will 'copy' her 'jie jie' in anything. I get to have a quiet lunch while the girls busy with their drawing.

They continue playing at playground. I end up drawing a hop scotch on the sand. We play hop scotch for a while. Then, we numbered the same hop scotch and we had Maths game - addition and subtraction. We will put the little one into the box with the right answer from the addition and subtraction game. The young one will learn to recognize the number. It was really fun. We played word game too. We look around and find objects start with letter A to Z. We learn new words from each other. It was a fun 2 hours.

                                           

Assam BeeHoon/Vermicelli - Penang, Malaysia

This recipe if from my Ah Mah in Penang. She is a good cook and very good in cooking authentic nyonya food. I have decided to let my girls try some spicy food from Malaysia. Though they don't really like it, my husband and I enjoyed it. 

Ingredients (3 persons):

1. Chili boh (from Penang) / instant chili paste 

2. Lime juice / lemon juice

3. Bean sprout

4. Prawn

5. Bean curd 'tau kua'

6. Shallot

7. Spring onion

8. Sugar, salt, light soya sauce

9. 3 eggs (number of eggs depends on number of pax n beehoon quantity)

10. Minced garlic

Method:

A. Slice and fried tau kua. Cut 'tau kua' into small cubes (square) and set aside.

B. Slice shallot and fried until golden brown. Set aside. 

C. Mixed item 1, 2 and 8 together. If you like sourish taste, add vinegar.

D. Heat up the frying pan with cooking oil. Stir fried minced garlic and prawn.

E. Add beehoon n item C. Toss everything evenly.

F. Add bean sprout and toss evenly.

G. Add beaten egg and mix evenly.

H. Add tau kua and spring onion and toss evenly.

I. Last add fried shallot. Served.

Back in Malaysia, we like use this BeeHoon brand : Errawan (5 elephant head on the packaging). In Singapore, we use any brand and it turns out fine. This dish need a lot of patience because it takes strength to toss the beehoon. ^^. Happy trying.

                                            

       

Aglio Olio and Bruschetta from Italy

My girls are into noodle recently. They love pan mee, udon, Shanghai mee, and spaghetti. Since they like spaghetti, I took this opportunity to introduce Italy to them. I have made Aglio Olio (with a little modification to tailor to their taste bud) and bruschetta. 

Aglio Olio - 3 pax 

Ingredients:

1. Spaghetti

2. 5 strips of Chicken breast 

3. Italian herbs : basil, rosemary, oregano, thyme, parsley, red bell pepper

4. Sesame oil

5. Soya sauce

Steps:

1. Marinate the chicken strips with Italian herbs and a pinch of salt overnight.

2. Bring spaghetti to boil. Boiled until it's soft.

3. Drain it and toss with sesame oil and soya sauce. (You may use olive oil or fried garlic oil)

4. Sprinkle Italian herbs and toss it.

5. Marinated chicken strips - grilled

6. Served it with the spaghetti. 

Note: if you don't like chicken strip, you may change to bacon strips or prawn or any grilled vegetable to your liking.

Bruschetta - 2 pax

Ingredients:

1. 2 medium size tomatoes

2. 2-3 cloves of garlic

3. Scallion or spring onion - 3 small stalks

4. 1 tea spoon of Olive oil or cooking oil

5. A pinch of Italian herbs and salt

6. 1 loaf of baguettes

7. Garlic spread

Steps:

1. Cut tomatoes to small cubes.

2. Mince the garlic and scallions 

3. Mix tomatoes, garlic and scallions together.

4. Add olive oil and mix well.

5. Add Italian herbs and small pinched of salt and mix well.

6. Leave it in the fridge overnight.

7. Sliced the baguettes to the thickness of your liking and toast it.

8. If you like the garlicky taste, spread a layer of garlic spread on the sliced baguettes.

9. Spread the tomatoes mixture on it and served.

                                           

Rosti or Roschti - a Swish dish

We have been singing the 7 continents song at home. Prior to that, we have been playing games on spotting the right countries on map. Geography should not be dry subject. I remember I had to memorize and memorize to pass my geography subject in school and I don't like it. I believe every subject can be lively and fun. This week, we look into Switzerland. One of the favorite dish for kids is Rosti. 

Ingredients:

Russet potatoes (3 big size for 4 pax)

Butter (unsalted)

Method:

1. Place potatoes in a saucepan and cover with cold water.

2. Cover it with lid and place on a stove with 'hi' heat.

3. Let it boil for 10 minutes and turn off the stove.

4. Remove the potatoes and leave it to cool.

5. Place the potatoes in the fridge for about an hour until it's cold.

6. Remove the potatoes from the fridge. Peel and grated them into strips. Grated it when they are still cold. 

7. Melt the butter in the frying pan.

8. Place a handful of grated potatoes onto the melted butter. Flatten it to shape.

9. Pan fried one side until it's slightly brown before you turn to the other side. 

10. Served once both side are slightly brown. 

Making this dish required patience. The fire on the stove can not be too hot. If it's too hot, it will burn the grated potatoes. The butter can not be too generous too. It will become too 'buttery' if we place too much butter on the frying pan.

                                             

Welsh Rarebit - snack from Wales

From the book : Easy Snacks from Around the World by Heather Alexander.

Welsh Rarebit. It's a traditional snack from Wales. I think children will like it because it's cheddar cheese. It's tasty. After writing a long ingredients list, it's time to get into action. She woke up at 7am excitedly. We arranged the ingredients and she crack the eggs, beat it and mix all the necessary ingredient. Along the way, she noted down her observation. It was really fun watching every single step she made. 

Ingredients: (mostly from the book with little improvisation)

Bread*

2 eggs, beaten

8 ounces grated cheddar cheese

1 teaspoon of soya sauce*

2 teaspoons mustard

1 tablespoon butter

4 tablespoons milk

1 ripe tomato, sliced 

Steps:

1. Cracked and beat the eggs. 

2. Pour milk into the saucepan with low heat.

3. Gently pour the beaten eggs into saucepan and stir well with milk.

4. Add butter, mustard and soya sauce and mix well.

5. Make sure it's low heat as we don't want to burn the milk.

6. Slowly add cheddar cheese into the saucepan and stir well.

7. Continue to stir until the sauce is thick. 

8. Toast the bread and line up the tomato slices on it. Spread the savory melted cheese sauce on the bread.

9. Toast it on the sauce pan until golden brown. Served.

* Note: 

1. You can use any bread as long as you toast it before you spread the melted cheese sauce on the bread. According to the author, sourdough works well.

2. You may replace soya sauce with Worcestershire sauce.

                                            

                                           

And her observation: 

                                            

    

                                    

Cold Sesame Noodle

We have incorporated 'food' as one of the topic as we learn about the countries around world. She is getting very good at locating country in the map. She likes to involve in hands on activities and that includes cooking. I feel it's important to allow our children to learn about food. I think it's important for them to learn at young age about nutrition and junk food. This will allow them to learn the right 'vocabulary' of food so they can make the right choices later in their life. We were in the library and I spotted a book by Heather Alexander - Easy snacks from around the world. 

This book allow her to learn to make different type of snacks. The fun part is to know where the snacks comes from. This time she has choose to make Cold Sesame Noodle. According to Heather Alexander, this dish is from Hunan and Szechuan provinces in China. She had fun time locating the provinces in the world map. 

We have improvised the ingredients a little so it'll be tastier. 

Ingredient:

Spaghetti

Sesame oil

Rice vinegar

Light soya sauce

Brown sugar

Fresh ginger (thinly slice to 8 slices)

2 medium stalks of spring onion

2 small stalks of parsley (for fragrant)

1/2 cups of unsalted cashew nuts (other options : unsalted peanuts/almond)

Steps (for 3 persons):

1. Bring spaghetti to boiled. Drain when it's soft.

2. Mix 2 tablespoons of sesame oil and 1 tablespoon of light soya sauce to cooked spaghetti. 

3. Put aside. We didn't put it into fridge because we don't like cold noodle. You may put into fridge to chill the spaghetti.

4. Minced ginger. spring onion and parsley and set aside.

5. Crushed the cashew nuts.

6. In a bowl, mix 2 tablespoons of sesame oil, light soya sauce, rice vinegar, brown sugar and ginger. 

7. Pour the sauce into the spaghetti and toss until evenly coated. 

8. If your like cold spaghetti, store in the fridge until it's cold.

9. If not, you may serve immediately by adding crushed cashew nuts, minced spring onion and parsley. Toss until the spaghetti are well coated.

10. Served.

We had fun throughout the preparation. She was very focus and trying to understand the steps to make it right. This is another precious moment I had with her. Try it, it taste really good! 

                                                  

Lesson in Basketball court

5 years 7 months old

Mommy observed that you like outdoor activities. Mommy realized you like to play with the soft ball at home. You like to kick, throw and bounce (soft ball don't bounce back).

I have decided to get a small basketball/netball for you. You were so happy. Bouncing it at home, play ground and at every flat surface you can find. Mommy has decided to bring you to a basketball court this afternoon. You were running happily and starts shooting. As the goal post is for adult, it looks impossible for you to reach it. After a few tries, you ask for helped. Mommy showed it to you. After shooting, mommy said that we need to look for a children's heights basket. I caught myself saying this. Mommy, don't feel good as I have helped you judge the situation we were in. My self talk questioning me by thinking who said children can't shoot at adult's height basket. 

So I kept quiet and left you with the ball. You keep trying. You kept telling me it's too high. Mommy kept encouraging so you can go on. You strength increase as you practice. Eventually, you can throw it as high as the basket. You confident soar when you shoot it! You made it! Wow! You told me that you are proud of yourself. Mommy is happy for you.

I learnt a big lesson from here. As parents/caregiver, we don't judge a situation for a child too early. Let the child decides whether he or she wants to stop trying. We can encourage. Adult's mind are fill with analysis of 'can or cannot do'. Children don't. Children do things as they desire. It comes from heart. That's powerful. When there's a will, there's a way. 

I learn to keep quiet when I see limitation. I need to encourage first and let you decides whether it can be done (Not life threatening situation). Allowing you to decide and make decision will help you in many more decision making to come. This afternoon has teaches us that perseverance pays. You kept trying and you made it. Mommy is very happy for u.

                                                 

Ee Wern communicates with mommy

16 months 3 weeks old

This week is our second week at BSF at Bethesda Bedok -Tampines Church. The first time, you were not aware that mommy will leave you to a 2 hours class. You cried a little and hold on pretty well. Today, you cried when I leave you, for a few seconds. Mommy realized you can control your emotion very well. Teacher said you were not certain at first, eventually you starts to participate and enjoys it. 

Mommy thinks you adapt fast in new environment. Tonight, after dinner, you were holding the table mat. You put it on the floor and lie down on it. Then, you stand up and 'tap dance'. You did this for a few times. Mommy don't understand so I sat down besides you as you wished. 

Mommy starts to understand when I gave you a towel that you used in BSF class. You happily lie down. then, you stand up and tap dance again. Mommy was moved. Moved by your desire wanting to share your experience with me. You were delighted when I acknowledged that this is what you learn in BSF. 

Mommy admires your ability to communicate using your body language so I can understand. Daddy and mommy love you.

Child-Like Learning about Coins

It's time to teach simple calculation and money management as she (my eldest girl) is starting Primary 1 next year. 

We started with simple counting exercise. Besides counting, we sum different combination of one dollar. Then, she traced the coins. We continue to play. We take turn to be hawker and customer. This has helped her in counting especially addition and subtraction. After playing for 2 days, I continue to prepare her on saving versus spending. 

As she was preparing for a school visit, her school asked her to bring SGD 3 (combination of SGD1, 4xSGD0.20, 1xSGD0.50, 7xSGD0.10). With my previous experience with her, she need to learn not to spend all her pocket money. So I initiated by asking how much she plan to spend during her school visit. She said she plan to buy chicken rice, ice milo and an apple. So we estimated it will cost her about SGD 2. With that, I asked how much she can saved by deducting SGD2. She took sometime to count and answered SGD1. I continue to asked is there anything that she wants to eat? She said 'mamee' which is a junk food. It will cost her another SGD 0.30. With that, i asked how much can she saves? She answered SGD 0.70. 

So I continued to clarify whether is it better to save more or little. She answered little because with money she can buy things she likes. So I continue to compared SGD 1 and SGD 0.70 using more or less. I asked which is more, SGD 1 or SGD 0.70? She said SGD 1. So which is better? SGD 1 is more and SGD 0.70 is less. She pondered a while and answered SGD 1. So I asked, which is better, more or less? She said, more. I concluded that it's important to save more than spend money on things that's not important (like mamee, it's junk food). The more we save, the more opportunity we can utilize our saving to better use. 

Few things I learnt here:

1. Children at this age (5 years old) are very instant. When they have power to purchase things they want, they will buy. They can't utilized judgement yet. Their judgement is 'child like' judgement. If I want that, I will buy it. Period..

2. It's important for parents to role play with their children in new situation. The more we role play, the more 'control' possibilities come up and we, parents gets to control the thinking and the outcome before they step to the real world. They carry the benchmark they learned with you (parents) and compare when similar situation arise. 

3. Be patience. When they starts counting money, it can be very confusing for them. At primary level, I feel they need to know combination of coins to make it a dollar. So be patience and play with them. Help them identify a few different combination of a dollar.

4. Continue to follow up and play money game. 

After her school visit, she happily told me that she used SGD 0.80 for her fish ball noodle. She didn't buy any drink because she has water with her. Her eyes brighten when she said she saved SGD 2.20.  I am so happy for her. 

To judge or not to judge?

Recently I spoke to few mothers about education. It looks like (always been) the Chinese school system here put a lot emphasis on academic. 

Mother will say 'poor thing'. Parents wish their children to have more outdoor activities but 'no' time. Children have to go through so much pressure. Parents tried to sits with them every night to completed their homework together. This culture of 'supervising' has been going on and become a norm. The amount of pressure the children go through in their early years is 'no joke'. 

What's school expectation for a 7 years old child? They are expected to know how to write and spell. They are expected to be able to read, 'good' in comprehension, 'fast' in abacus and obedient in class. Children in Standard/Primary 1 are expected to read and write basic Chinese character. Teacher will call the parents if the child is 'slow' in the class. What about parents' expectation?

Parents always think their children can do better. They expect their children to stay focus and discipline in finishing their homework. They expect their children to follow instruction and direction by teacher in the class. Parents expect children to be less playful. It is a scary thought that children are expected to play less once they start school. The 'lingo' will be - have you finish your homework? Children is being force into a system. We have even seen parents took up mathematics class so they can teach Maths at home. (Nothing wrong with it) Parents is being force and conform into a system too. Parents desperately want their children to excel. We know, it's love. What about society pressure?

Are we careful about the different between 'society' standard and our children's standard? Society standard is temptation to parents. It's mass. All marketing activities from private will tailor to society standards and enticed parents to response accordingly. We will see all the advertising from enrichment centre promoting about 'additional' enrichment to prepare a child towards Standard/Primary 1. Some of day care centre unique selling proposition are preparing a child to Primary 2 when they are in Primary 1. Is that necessary? Can't the society learn to be patience towards our children and pace them age appropriately? Pressure among parents too. We starts to worry. Worry whether our child is ready to enter the school system. 

Parents are in dilemma when they starts preparing their child to Standard/Primary 1. The more we know about the education system, the more we feel they are loopholes. Parents feel uncertain, helpless and hopeless. Uncertain because limited choices, helpless because we can't control the outcome of which school the child is being send to and hopeless because we question the relevance of syllabus versus the 'real' world. We don't want to put our children to an unnecessary rat race on academic. But we don't want our children to slack because of no direction either. We don't denied the important of academic but we value more about children exposure and proactivity telling us their needs so we evaluate and make decision together. It's their life, not our life. Empowerment is easy to 'say' but not easy when 'practice'. 

What we can do as parents to cushion these external pressure? 

Don't judge our children's ability. Because of external pressure, it's very easy for educators and parents to judge their children. Children as early as 3 years old is being judged. Comments like 'she is loud', 'he is too active and noisy', 'he is a slow learner', 'she is obedience', 'he is bossy' and so on is everywhere. I call these 'free opinions'. This is unfair to children. They are curious in the world around them. As their mobility increase, that's when the fun starts. And that's when all the judgement come too. Therefore, it's important for parents to not to pass judgement in front of their child. Don't label them. The world that our children live in are so judging. Parents has to provide 'cushion' for it. If children feels safe and not being judge at home, they will prosper. Children will raise their 'bar' and achieve.

Parents have to grow within themselves. They have to learn to see things beyond their children. To lead their children and not undermining their ability. Leading them to love learning, to love exploring, to respect authority, to understand the important of boundaries, to inculcate the right eating and sleeping habits, to learn self control, to empower decision making that build self confident and self worth age appropriately and the list go on. Parents should lead their children into possibilities of becoming and not conforming. Parents should learn to stop 'commenting' but empowering. Having said that, all families have their own priority to mould their children.

To lead is to trust. Do we trust our children enough? This is tough. 'Trust them'? 'Trust these little people?' Learning to let go the 'control' is a learning experience for parents. If parents feel their children's decision is incomplete (most of the time) children will learn to depend too much on parents. In return, parents will feel burden and continue to make decision for them. The vicious cycle go on and on. The child will never grow. Parents should understand that they shouldn't babysit their children forever. To trust them is to see things through our children's paradigm. Our own paradigm is full of our past experiences. Our children's paradigm has no past experiences but with our influence. If parents are able to provide positive influence and empowerment, the child will learn and take full responsibility of their life. And prosper. 

Take time off to crystallize the family value. Rat race in the world will go on and on. It's important for parents to know their vision for their family before they are being sucks into a system. By holding onto a strong family value, our children will learn too. First, they learn from their parents. Then, they will learn not to conform if the external temptation and pressure go against their value system. 

Initiate involvement. Include our children before we make any decision for them. This is tough. Especially when parents know they know better (with life experiences). Eg. If a child is weak in Maths, does he need an enrichment / a tuition class? Yes and No. The question we should ask is what drive him to learn? We shouldn't focus on his weakness and tell the whole world he needs to attend tuition. We should discuss find out what drives him to achieve and improve. I know, it's easy say than done. Organize weekly discussion to discuss issues. Make decision together as family. The family will not only prosper, a confident with good self esteem child will emerge from here. 

All it takes is practice and time. Practice makes things perfect. Time will show us the result. When our children see us putting in effort to work things out as family together, they will learn to work things out with us. They will learn to be sensitive to our needs. They will learn to respect authority when we say 'no'. They will learn to handle disappointment when things don't happen their way and will pick themselves up to move on. They will learn that it's ok not to conform and be identical all the time. 

I am writing this to remind myself. I am living in the world with multiple temptation and pressure from different sources. It's acceptable for not being perfect as parents. We are human. But it's not acceptable if parents 'forget' to look at a child strength and help him grow. Let's allow our children enjoy every bit of their childhood with us. Let them be the child they want to be. 

Things that matters most..

It's a month! A month of school holidays. We are back to Malaysia for 2 weeks. It's a week now. Time flies. It was good to meet people that matters to us. Catch up and eat! 

We have been away for a year. I realized it's s easy to take things for granted in our daily life. When we were here, we would justify whether to take an extra effort to meet person A or person B. Partly because we were very busy in our career then, coping with work and family and feels tired most of the time. Therefore, there are time we made decision of staying at home. Excuses and reason is always there.

This trip allowed me to see the importance to make an extra effort (despite super pack schedule) to meet friends and family. I realized the strong relationship will last for a long long time. We are modeling. Teaching our children the important to building relationship with people that matters to us. 

This was a fruitful visit since the last one year. I get to meet my CG friends. Ee Rynn has decided on her first sleep over. As I am sitting here pondering whether she will be ok, I realized it's time to let go. Mommy has to learn to let go so she can learn to be independent. She stayed over at her favourite uncle Kah Wan's house. He is our CG leader. Ee Rynn is so close to her 13 years old daughter. A wise man told me when I was young to allow our children to build relationship with someone whom I trust (same value system). Because there will be times we (as parents) will not able to influence them positively. This is when these person will play an important role. I am glad Ee Rynn has build a few relationship with few friends whom we trust and able to influence her positively. 

I get to meet my family, some of my friend and ex-colleagues. Everyone seems has moved on in life but the relationship stays. This visits has taught me a lesson. To make effort to build priceless relationship that will last for a life time. 

Family Holiday in Phuket ( 2nd to 6th June 2013 )

Very excited with this holiday.. Have mixed feeling because little Ee Wern get restless in a confine seats.. Thinking of ways to keep her occupied will make me anxious. As for Ee Rynn, she choose to play iPad games instead of doodling. She has her favourite Ribena pastilles and that's it.. 

2 hours journey to Phuket was smooth. Ee Wern was occupied with magazine, songs (sing by daddy and mommy), view outside the window and biscuits. As it will take another hour of car ride to the hotel, I decided to feed her so she can nap for an hour in the car. That worked well too. This is our first family holiday since Ee Wern's arrival. We didn't do any prior 'homework' on what is Club Med all about. All we know : it's a family friendly hotel that provide ample activities for children, baby sitting service, free flow of food, liquor and wine. 

We were excited and right after snack, we spend time together in the pool. My girls love it! The hotel provides unlimited of wrist band, floats and beach ball to children. Subsequently, we went to the hotel tour to familiarize with the facilities. The service was not up to our expectation though. Hubby was quite upset. Food wasn't that great. For children, this is heaven! Unlimited ice cream during lunch n dinner and unlimited chocolate milk shake throughout the day! Beach was fantastic! Sandy beach with strong wind and waves. Recommended for surfing! Sand is very fine! Perfect to build sand castles. 

The next morning, Ee Rynn heads for children activities in mini club. We had quiet time with Ee Wern by the pool. My 15 months old loves to swim. Her favourite words are daddy, mommy, jie jie,  'there' (pointing her finger to direction she wants to go), 'mommy come' and 'mum mum' means food. After a good half an hour in the pool, she was tired and slept in the stroller. I get to read, yay yay.. Sea breeze with piña colada and a book. Perfect! In the afternoon, Ee Wern is in nursery, baby club. We paid for the baby sitting. Ee Wern screams for daddy and mommy when we left her at baby club. We feel sad but we have decided to try out. Daddy was anxious and stood at reception for a good 15mins before we left. Hubby has decided to go for a massage. I had my quiet time again. Sea breeze with 'mosquito killer (a name given to a glass of cocktail)' and a book. Perfect!

We had family dinner together. Catching up.. Ee Rynn was curious why I can read whole day. You mean you read since morning? Yes, I answered. Her eyes 'blink' with disbelief. *cute*. As for Ee Wern, the arrangement turns out fine. 'Pretend' to wailed a little when she saw me. 'Phew'.

The adventure starts the following day. We had light breakfast and head to 'trapeze' area for flying trapeze and bungee jump for kids. Ee Rynn loves it except for flying trapeze. She said she will try again at 11 years old. We wonder why 11 years old... Hehe We head to the beach after that. Family time together. Stayed there for a while as the sun is burning hot. It was very dry with strong wind. Ee Rynn loves it. In the afternoon, I have decided to try flying trapeze for adult. Did the simple practice before I climbed up. That little butterfly in my tummy was activated when I held the pole. Erm.. No turning back.. So I jumped and swing and perform the 'trick' they taught me. It went well. I never knew I can hang upside down swinging. I love it. First word that came into my mind is 'freedom'. Seeing the world in different angle :-) (picture below) Ee Rynn was cheering 'yay, mommy did it'! That feels good :-) 

Body aches though.

We have decided to send Ee Wern to full day baby sitting on Wednesday. She was exhausted from beach and pool the day before. After we sent her to baby club, we head to trapeze area again for kids bungee jump. Ee Rynn wants to try again. We head to archery next. It look simple but it's not. It took balancing to shoot correctly. Our arrows were flying with no direction. Haha. It's was fun! My hubby likes sport with no adrenaline rush while I prefer sports with it. We are so different :-) We head to beach next and it's one to one time with Ee Rynn. It was daddy and daughter's time. They spend a good 3 hours on the beach! Mommy has decided to read, eat and went for a massage with facial. I went to try flying trapeze again. Second time was different. Instead of thinking whether I can do it, I am thinking about improvement. Good to know I have conquered the fear.

When we picked Ee Wern in the evening, hubby and I has decided not to sent our girls to any babysitting anymore in any of our holidays. We missed her! We felt something was missing without bubbly Ee Wern. Haha.

Daddy and Ee Rynn stayed back for acrobatic show. Ee Wern and I head back to our room. Ee Wern was tired and slept early. We checked out the next day, on Thursday. It was a bumpy ride to airport. The driver kept pressing between brake and pedal. Ee Wern was struggling with me all the way, crying and screaming. Eventually she was exhausted and slept. Upon checking in our luggage, Ee Rynn vomited! 'Splashed' like a waterfall! Oppsss, right in front of the conveyor belt. She felt better after that. She was complaining about giddiness throughout the bumpy ride.

It was a challenging one hour plane ride. Ee Wern was restless. She was tired but can't settle down. I was telling my hubby that we should have a pacifier so she can settled down. I knew we shouldn't allow toddlers to depend on external comfort. Children should learn to settle down on their own. She dose off right before landing and I had to carry her all the way. Imagine walking for 15minutes with a pack of 15kg rice.

We are not sure whether we will choose Club Med for our next family holiday. Hubby felt the food was like a canteen food despite the variety. I kinda ok with it as I get to educate Ee Rynn. Educate Ee Rynn on different countries and foods. The foods serve consists of speciality from different country.

If you are someone who like to have continuous activities in your holiday, Club Med can be a good choice. The hotel is always busy with activities. However, if you like a laid back holiday (beach bump), Club Med might not be a right fit. This is just my personal opinion.

We are looking forward to our next adventures!

Assurance from Ee Rynn's K2 teacher

We attended Parents Teachers Meeting at Ee Rynn's school. Ee Rynn was excited showing us her projects. She has 3 projects : Starfish, fruits and ice bowl fruit salad projects.

We cherished the moment. She would explained and described the details. Who draw this, who makes that, who write this, who create that and so on.

Waited for a while and we met her Mandarin teacher. She commented that Ee Rynn can see a link between the Chinese characters she learnt. Especially in recognizing Chinese character. She recognize the similarity of a character that can be used in different sentence that bring different meaning. After clarification of preparation for Primary One, we meet her K2 teacher.

The first comment was 'What I like about both of you is you guys are on the ball and current'. She has progress very well. She loves to learn new things, want to lead, want to contribute, able to express her thought and participate very well. You have supported her well at home. She is ready for Primary One. Continue to do what you are doing.

This opinion has make my day. When I have decided to stay home, I never thought of wanting affirmation from 3rd party. Nurturing our girls are our priority and laying the foundation in these crucial years is our decision. We never measure our sacrifice. This comment has once again reminded me that the 'result' of my effort is 'unseen' at times but the reward is enormous. I call it 'delayed gratification'. Unlike at work, we have 'to do list' and 'check' it once it's completed.

We can't 'complete' our task in building a family. It needs loves, patience, perseverance and passion! I would never trade my experience now with another job promotion.

I feel so blessed and priviledge too. Growing up with my girls has taught me many lessons. Thank you God for your guidance and assurance as our family grow together.

The Story Behind Cold Storage Kids Run 2013

It was a bright sunny morning when I woke up to prepare for the run. Made chicken ham egg mayonnaise sandwich for my hubby n Ee Rynn. Cooked porridge for Ee Wern. As we were running late (as usual with young children), I make 3 big protein scoops with milo to fill my tummy. Luckily I have packed the race bag the night before.

It was our first time driving to town. When we found the building we wanted to park, the queue was long. Feeling anxious as we have to reach the holding point, at least for Ee Rynn (her runs start first), we run down and left Ee Wern with daddy queuing into car park. 

It was a bright sunny morning. Weather was perfectly well. This sanguine mommy packed the sunblock in the race bag but it was with daddy. So now what? Luckily a friendly mommy lent her sunblock to me and I pat some on Ee Rynn face. Ee Rynn was excited. Her first run.

Ee Rynn: mommy, I will run very fast. Can you follow me? 

Mommy: I will try my best, with a warm smiley face.

When the MC announce there was Bob The Builder mascot, the crowd went wild. I had to carried Ee Rynn with all my strength so she can waved from the back to the mascot. When the whistled was blowed, the crowd in front of us started running. Ee Rynn was building up the momentum and ready to RUN. I was so ready to follow her from the back. I knew if she is determined to be fast, she will. In a split second, a boy running side way and hit Ee Rynn to the ground. Imagine the momentum of running is building up and something hit very hard from the side. I was startle. Ee Rynn started to cry. It was a very hard knocked. Her face hit the ground. Her knee was scratched. With God's protection, no sign of bleeding. But it was painful. My decision that she wore a long pants for the race help protect her legs. I hold her hand, walked to the side and knelt down. Looking at her, crying so badly, I was very very sad. Sad because it was painful. Angry (in my mind) because 'blaming' that boy's father didn't take care of his son properly. The MC has reminded the parents over and over again to take care of our own children.

My mind was working like a parachute. What should I do now? Silly me, I asked Ee Rynn whether she want to continue.. She said don't want (of course, she fell). I tried to comfort her and she cried harder. What should I do? Arghh.. I took a deep breath, divine intervention happen :-P I am thinking, my daughter has prepared herself to get a medal from this run (though it's not a competitive run). And this is what has happened. Things happened in life, in real life. Should we backed off? She don't have injury. Reality, we can get the medal when we finish the run. I read that when children was sad, just be there for them and quietly lead them so they feel secure in our arm. Then they will be up n bouncing again. I took a deep breath. I hold her hand, started walking. She was still crying and tried to stop me from continuing our walk. I quietly hold her hand and assure her (despite all the cheering by the volunteer) that let's walk a little and we decide later when she stop crying. 

Slowly step by step, from very sad to getting back to 'so so mood'. She started to look around. She told me she's going to be the last. She don't like to be the last. I smiled. Still keeping quiet. Her real reason why she cried is verbalized. We continue our journey until the finishing line. She got her medal. On the way to meet her daddy, I told her that I am glad she has crossed the finishing line and that she obtained her medal. I am happy that she don't give up. She wasn't happy about it yet. She showed her grumpy face to her daddy and told daddy about the incident. Daddy assured her that she crossed the finishing line and that's what mattered most. (We have SMS each other so the story n encouragement is consistent :-P)

She started to feel a little bit better when she gotten her lollipop. Kids are so cute. But she is still holding on to the 'incident'. 

At quiet time tonight, we were chatting. We are into song creation.  We took nursery rhyme and change the lyric according to our creativity. She created this lyrics according to 'twinkle twinkle little star' rhyme:

Cold Storage run is really fun,

But a boy knocked me and I fell down,

But I hold my mommy's hand,

I finished the race and did not give up,

Cold Storage run is really fun,

I am happy I didn't give up.

My tears almost rolling down. It was 'not giving up' lesson that we want her to experience and she learnt it. I am so so glad that I don't rattle on and on, trying to console her. Feeling sorry for her on uncontrolled event will make her feel pity. By merely holding on and walked to cross the finishing line, this 5 years old learnt the most valuable lesson that many parents want their children to learn. It has affirmed me again that it's not what we say but it's through our action, that kids learnt the most. 

For adult, we can easily said it's not our lucky day. But, we as parents, we can't blame a situation that happen to us as unlucky. They will grow up and blaming instead of taking responsibility. Modeling, modeling and modeling... This is a reality. Things happen despite planning. It's important to perseverance and continue the journey despite circumstances. I learnt again, to apply in my own life. 

 I am so so glad that I continued. It would be so so easy for me to cross the road and walked back to holding point and rest. Because I was sad seeing her cry. Mother wants to protect her child. I am glad I continued...

My Child is Testing My Limit - Parenting Basics Part 4

Have you ever think that why my child test me all the time? Or why my child put me into trouble and embarrass me? Or why my child likes to challenge my authority and test their boundaries? I use to get very upset when I am faced with defiance moment. A child that scream at me in public, a child that throw a fork and hit another person next to our table, a child that scream and shout (because didn't get to buy her favourite toy) all the way to car park and a child that lying down on the floor screaming in the shopping mall? Or you have a screaming child in a cot wanting attention and a child that constantly biting his sibling? Familiar? If not, you are lucky! Appreciate your child.

We might think the cause could be no effective enforcement of limit and punishment at home. We use time out, threats, hand hitting, threatening voice, raise our hands pretending to hit and so on, nothing work. The worst part is it brought guilts to us. If we want our children to behave, why are we modeling such bad behavior? The worst part is the older child will model our behaviour and threaten the younger siblings.

Don't we want to have a trusting relationship with our children? Don't we want to ensure we are the person they turn to when they are indecisive about important decision in life?

I realized that they are not doing it purposely. The good news is our toddler and preschooler are too young to plan a plot to test us. Many of times, parents get into power struggle because it's a parent problem. A child does something that don't make sense to parents but make sense to themselves. They spill water from the cup because of their curiosity. Parents see it as chore to clean up. They empty their cupboard because they like the motion of putting things in and out the closet, we see them as being naughty and messing around. They run and jump into the swimming pool with joy, we give them one hour lecture on why they shouldn't. (yes, they shouldn't but we don't lecture them and give impression that swimming pool is dangerous). They used up all the shower gel in one time because they love the smell and bubbles from it. We see them as playful. They love the world so much and try to make sense in the world they live in. We need to learn to cool down before we react. Yes, I am talking to myself. I need to take 3 deep breath (my husband remind me that always) and think again.

Second, they throw tantrum or whining because they have lost their connection with us. They are away to school and day care while we work. They missed us, the most important person in their life. When we pick them from day care, reach home only to find out that they leave their bag in the middle of the living room, socks at the doorstep, blast the radio etc. We feel annoyed and starts commenting. Over time, they feel they are not loved. They feel they are loved only when they do their chores and when they behave. They feel they are love conditionally. The love connection is lost. Imagine we are at work whole day. We look forward to reach home so we can do things we like. Children too. They are in day care for more than 8 hours and they look forward to come home, the place they belong and do things they like.

The best thing to do is we freshen up and spend time to listen and chat before we head to do our chores. Spend time to listen. Yes, listen. Connect with them. I learned not to ask close ended question because all I get is OK, Good, Not bad, a one word answer. I always crack my head and try to ask open ended question like : What did you learn from school today? Who is sitting next to you during lunch time? How did you solve the maths problem today? Can you show me how to write the chinese character you learn today? What game did you play outdoor today? Who is your playmate in circle time? Let them talk as much as they want to. From the conversation, they will feel secure in our presence. Once they feel secure, they will be themselves and more importantly, they will be the best them and even try to please us. They feel good about themselves. Our children feel important.

I remember when my second child was born, daddy took over story book time at night. Out of the 3 months, I read about 7 days in total. The intimate connection between me and my elder girl was lost. Before my second child, I read story book and bible story to her most of the time. It became worst when we moved to a new country. She entered new school, new routine, new friends and new environment. She would scream easily in public, scream to daddy in a restaurant, breakdown easily at home, woke up at least 3 times after midnight (my eye was very panda look ^^), reluctant to listen and very demanding. I don't recognise it as terrible 2 or 3 or 4. I don't believe in such labelling. There must be underlying issue. I was upset and thought I have failed as a mom. I recognised the problem and proactively read and read and read and purchased online parenting course to learn.

What I did was, I plan one to one time with her. I ensure my baby go for afternoon nap when she comes back from school and give her full attention. It took me about 3 weeks to see the different. Now, she is like angel. She will negotiate and make decision together with me, cooperatively. I am counting my blessing. The next challenge now is my baby is reluctant to take afternoon nap. She has grown. So I introduce quiet time at home. When my elder girl has her quiet time, I have one to one time with my second child. When my second child has her quiet time in the cot, I have one to one time with my elder girl. It's not easy for them to have such habit. One would scream and shout from the cot and one will breakdown and asked why.

I found out that children will behave and want to please their parents if they feel loved unconditionally. If a child continuously having behavioral problem, it's important for parents to be deliberate to find the cause and assist the child. We wish all the parents out there the best and stay connected always to your children. Every child is special.

Thanks for reading my thoughts.

Note: I rule out all the behavioural problem that require medical attention.

Mother's Day 2013

As Mother's and Father's Day is approaching, this is the theme song at home by you, Ee Rynn. You hummed it every day. It's lovely.

Mommy, mommy, I love you,
And you know I really do,
I know you love me too,
That's why I sing for you.

Daddy, daddy, I love you,
And you know I really do,
I know you love me too,
That's why I sing for you.

~and~ 

Mmmm is for mommy,
Mommy, I love you,
Mmmm is for mommy,
Mommy, I love you

Mmmm is for mommy,
Mommy, I love you,
Mommy, mommy, mommy, I love you
Mommy, mommy, mommy, I love you

~and~

Happy Mother's Day to you

Happy Mother's Day to you

Happy Mother's Day to mommy

Happy Mother's Day to you

You were so excited about Mother's Day. On Saturday morning, you planned with daddy. You told daddy your plan and write it down in your planner. Throughout Saturday, you told me you have surprise for me, but you cannot tell me. Mommy enjoyed your excitement.

Ee Rynn: mommy, I am going to tell daddy a secret but you cannot listen. Mommy, cover your ear.

It is very cute to see you whispering to daddy. This happened throughout Saturday. 

On Sunday morning, you bounced out from bed. You woke daddy up. You ask me to stay in the room. You prepared toast bread for mommy and daddy helped to fried an egg. You told daddy you want to serve the breakfast on a serving tray. You even told daddy that mommy should drink fresh milk today instead of milo or coffee. You told daddy it's healthier to drink fresh milk. You put the Mother's Day card beside the tray when you served the breakfast. 

Mommy enjoyed the breakfast this morning. As usual, you would want me to share my breakfast with you and you will end up eating my portion. 

In the afternoon, mommy get to rest. You were so excited when daddy took out the cake for Mother's Day. You commanded to put 4 candles. We ask why and you said you like it. We were so full after the cakes and you requested mommy to take early snack again. You served yogurt on the serving tray. Your excitement has put a smile in mommy's heart. I never felt so special before. Someone who want to serve me so dearly :-) You continue to sing Mother's Day song throughout the afternoon. 

Next, you plan to swim. You want to play game in the swimming pool. So we tag along. When we reach the pool, you met your friend and continue playing with her until dinner time. Throughout our dinner, you continue to sing the Mother's Day song. Mommy really enjoyed your excitement. 

You have made a potpourri pouch for me from school. You told me you thread the potpourri pouch on your own. Thank you, my dear.

For Ee Wern, you enjoyed the food. As mommy didn't cook today, you get to eat out. You tried pineapple fried rice, mix vegetable, abalone soup, grilled potatoes, stewed pork, marshmallow and lemongrass ginger Haagen Dazs ice cream. You kept asking for 'mum mum'. You were so bubbly throughout the day.

Mother's Day will never be the same without both of you. Thank you for making mommy's so special. Thank you daddy too, for all the arrangement and planning. I love the buffet dinner.

 

you plan this in your planner

 

yummy breakfast

 

yummy cake and sumptuous dinner

happy faces

 

potpourri pouch

 

 

mommy didn't know that I am a super mom to you :-)



Ice Bowl Fruits Salad

10th May 2013 - Ee Rynn at 5 years and 6 months old

Ee Rynn, you came home full of excitement. You shared you enjoyed eating the fruits salad you made in school. You want to make it again at home. As we don't have grapes and kiwi, we use apple, peach and dragon fruit. It was a fun moment to watch you doing it. It was yummy!

 

 



Happy Mother's Day - 12 May 2013

Since 2007, being promoted to 'mommy' is a great deal. I anticipate with anxious and joy upon the arrival of our first born. I am not equipped with an experience as a mom. It's all hands on. We all do. All moms eventually become very good at being a mom. We are at the highest survival skills ever in our life providing to our bundle of joy. We are being put in the lime light and being perceived as expert when our precious arrived.

Over the years, I believe these are the things we did as a mom:

1. A dentist - when our child had food stuck in his mouth, we help to clear it. When our child complain of teething pain, we soothe by cuddling and applying tether gel. We teach them to brush their teeth properly.

2. A doctor - when our child complain about stomach pain, we have to diagnose the pain. Pain cause by anxiety due to attending new school? Discomfort cause by poops accumulation? Pain cause by colic? Pain because of gastric? Discomfort cause by food poisoning? We are getting really good at diagnosing. We can't send them to doctor every time, right? We help clean their wound and help them understand it takes time to heal. We become a walking dictionary for all the possible sickness for children. Eg: type of fever, type of rashes, type of poops..

3. A teacher - We want the best for them. We teach and model valuable life skills. We tutor them during exam. We solve the problem in their homework. We provide a learning environment at home. We feed their curious mind. We spend time talking to them on world around us. We help them make sense in the world they live in.

4. A nutritionist - We ensure they have the right nutrition. We google and read about nutrient in vegetable, fruits and all other food stuff. We read nutrients and vitamins they need daily age appropriately. We model living a healthy life style.

5. A chef - We get very creative in preparing the right food so they will gobble within seconds. We educate them on proper eating habits. We model and practice hygiene food preparation. We restrict them on junk food intake.

6. A finance minister - We educate them to save, invest and spend wisely. We help and empower them in planning their weekly allowances. We do the maths with them so they don't over indulge themselves because of impulse needs.

7. A supporter - We believe and feed their visions on who they want to be. We provide environment and exposure allowing them to experience life age appropriately. We provide opportunity for them to make decisive decision for themselves (age appropriately). We help them to cope with grieve of failure and lift them to soar again. We believe in them and let go when they are ready to 'go'.

8. An event planner - We plan for their birthday, outing, play dates, exercise, Father's Day, brother or sister's birthday, teacher's appreciation day at school and so on. We google to find ideas and best deals. We plan outing with grandpa and grandma. We plan outing that help in fostering family relationship.

9. A helper - We clean everything you can think of in the house. We teach them to sort out their soggy clothes. We teach them to fold their clothes and arrange in their closet. We ensure they pack the right items they need in school. We remind them to drink water.

10. An actress - We pretend when they need us to take part in their imaginative play. We pretend as a sore loser when they want to win. We pretend to see the world according to their paradigm. We pretend to be funny to get our message across.

11. A security guard - We ensure they are safe all the time. We rationalize with them on unsafe situation. We teach them how to handle uncertainty. We provide environment for them to practice.

We become wholesome and wiser because of them. Being a mom has made us flexible to the highest degree. Flexible to handle all the unexpected moment anytime of the day. Flexible to be out of control and be in driver seat again. Flexible to laugh and cheer even at the lousiest moment. We become courageous in making decision for our children and handle the grieve if it's a wrong one. We learn everyday in building relationship with them. With them, we try things we never tried before and be proud of it.

These experience are priceless. Something we can't tag a price tag to it. To all my friends and mothers in the world, I wish you a Happy and Meaningful Mother's Day!


Note :

Some of these scriptures has helped me draw meaning to my motherhood.

Titus 2:4-5 : Then they can train the younger women to love their husband and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to subject to their husband, so that no-one will malign the word of God

Titus 2:6-8 : Encourage the young men to be self-controlled. Inn everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness, ans soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.

Deuteronomy 6:6–7 : And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.
- We are available for them whenever they need us.

Ephesians 6:4 : Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
- We initiate communication that help them process the meaning in their life. We draw limits lovingly and firmly.

Ephesians 5:1-2 : Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children, and live a lofe of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.
- We provide affection and unconditional love irregardless situation. We provide acceptance and constant verbal support even when they fail.

Deuteronomy 4:9 : Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.
- We leave legacy my modelling integrity and godly life.

Celery Experiment

23rd April 2013 - Ee Rynn @ 5 years and 6 months old

Ee Rynn came to me wanting to know how plants drink water. She knew plants need water but how do they drink? She told me she saw an activity somewhere using food colouring and celery. So this is the list of items we have prepared.

1. plastic cup
2. food colouring
3. celery
4. chopping board
5. plastic knife

She choose yellow and red food colouring for this experiment. We filled the plastic cup with water and pour the food colouring into the plastic cup. She put the celery into each cup and told me to leave it overnight.

The next day, she want to cut the celery stem to check whether there's water in the stem. She explained that we will know by examine the tiny holes inside the celery stem. She chopped the celery and happy to see the tiny holes filled with yellow and red. She concluded that the celery drink water and causing the leaves to change colour according to the colour in the water.

She took out her note book and record her findings. She draw a picture of the celery too. It was a fun moment for us.

Ee Wern was attentive throughout :-)

 

Activities You Can Do with Your Children in your Daily Life

When my daughter turned 4 years old, she was active and always looking for things to do on her free time. I was not experience then, especially in looking for resources for children exposure. Along the way, I have learnt to note down some interesting activity that she can focus on.

Our primarily focus is to spend time with them during their growing up years. We want them to learn important life skills from us too. Home is the best place to learn because it's a safe place to improve and make mistake. Once they reach teenager years, they will have friends they want to spend time with. Therefore, in their early years, we want to build a strong and trusting relationship with them.

Below are some suggested activity you can easily do together with your children :-

1. Start a journal together with them. Note down their happiest and interesting moments. It will put a smile on their face when they read it again. It will remind them on memory they have with the family.  You can print some photo and stick on the journal book. Pictures speak a thousand words. Your child learn to cherish things in life.

2. Write thank you card to people that matters to them. Make time to help them count the blessing and be thankful to people that matters to them. You can bring them to post office to post the card. Your children will have opportunity to learn about post office too. This can be a yearly affairs. It can be on every December.

3. Turn on your favourite music and dance with them! It's time to bring out the little child in you. Your children need to see you letting loose and have fun too!

4. Cycling around the neighbourhood. Along the way, teach them about road safety. Remember to have fun along the way and don't turn the outing to a lecture session. You can plan a biking trip with them. Let them map out the route. They will have change to exercise their judgement skill.

5. Make your own wrapping paper. You can use them to wrap birthday or Christmas gift.

6. Unleash your child creativity. Design a family photo album. Let your child select pictures they like and get some material ready . Spend couple of weekends with them to produce the album. They will be delighted as output comes alive!

7. Mark important dates and decorate it on the calendar. Plan to do list on that important dates. The first thing they might tell you is their birthday! My birthday is an important day! :-)

8. If you have more than one child, let them choose a topic and arrange a play during Christmas or weekends when grandparents is around. This will strengthen relationship among siblings. It will help them to work together too.

9. Choose a topic and do a project with them. For example if you child likes car, then you can help him build a car model. Find some material that you can use to build a model. Eg: Clay, cardboard, wood, newspaper etc.. It'll definately takes more than a weekend. Building a model from scratch involve a lot of trial and error. Your child will learn that perseverance is important to achieve the right outcome they want. This is an important life skill. The good news is you are there to encourage and support them.

10. Make salt dough together. You can create lots of things with salt dough. Fridge magnet, snow man, hand and finger print, animal or flower model and the list go on and on. Fridge magnets can be given away as a gift too.

To ensure the mixture turn out right involve adding, subtracting, measuring and judgement. Your child will learn maths concept like composition and measuring. Your child will have chance to practice their judgement skills too. Baking with them are fun too.

11. Play dress up with them. Take out some old clothes and look for material to enhance it. For example use fabric paint or pens to add new print on it, use ribbon and sew it to the edge of the collar etc. The process creates lots of fun and spark creativity.

12. Plan a camping trip. Let your children plan the activities. It will open up their world to nature and skills to survive with basic amenities.

13. Get a glass marker and let your child unleash their creativity on window or sliding door at home. You can clean it easily after that.

14.  Organize play date with kids in different age. Let the older kids plan for treasure hunt. The older kids can exercise their leadership skills to lead the younger children. The young ones will learn teamwork to find the answer.

15. Decorate an old jewelry box.

16. Have a balloon or pillow fight.

17. Work with your child on your supermarket trip. Your child can learn about Mathematics in supermarket. They can learn about sorting, categorization and counting. Eg: Explain to your child that supermarket categories things and let your child direct you to the right aisle to pick up things according to your shopping list. It's exciting when they can find they favorite milk!

18. Let you child plan a meal (age appropriate). They will be thrilled to see what's on the dining table. For sure, it's a life skills that they need to learn.

19. Select a topic (general knowledge) and organize a show and tell. You can start with topic that interest them most. Show them informations (if they are young) and encourage them to share their point of view with you.

If you have an older child, let them do some research in the library and share their finding with you. Make sure you do your research too. Your children learn through modeling. If they know you put in effort, you will be very very surprise of the output from your children. In the long run, you are building a relationship where your child can talk to you about anything under the sun! You will become their friend.

20. Imaginative play. Suppose your child tells you that he's a doctor. You can play along with them imagining all the possible situation in a doctors' life. Let them lead the play and act it out.

Or your child tells you that she's a princess. You can act as a servant and serve them. It's fun to see them pretending. It helps them in expressing their thought and enrich their vocabulary. They might stop, blinking their eyes and tell you to pause just to ask you how to describe certain thing. This will lead to teaching moment.

I hope I have enriched your imagination and ideas. I hope you will enjoy some suggested activities above as we do. Please tailor the activities to you child's age. Learning should be fun.

I hope you can take some time to share with me here if you have tried them. Or please share with me if you have other fun ideas.

Have Fun!